What should you do if your spouse gets a job offer from a competitor of your employer?

Most people know they should report the potential conflict of interests to their ethics office. And most ethics officers will work with you and your colleagues in creating processes that will avoid actual conflicts and leaks from your organization.

But what about your spouse and the competitor? What is your and your organization’s responsibility? That is a step often overlooked by ethics officers. In some circumstances, it might be reasonable, even advisable, to ask the spouse to inform the competitor of the apparent conflict. In other cases, the ethics officer might even call the competitor’s ethics office to discuss the matter.

Think of it this way: we ask employees to disclose conflicts to their organization in part because if something goes wrong later on, it will look suspicious if the conflict was not disclosed, even if the conflict had no bearing on the thing going wrong. Similarly, we need to consider how our organization will be perceived if something goes wrong and we made no attempt to let the competitor know that we knew of the potential conflict, even if the conflict had no bearing on the thing going wrong.

To some, this might feel like overreaching. To me, it’s a reasonable additional layer of protection for all involved.

Many studies have found that the most successful people are not the ones with the most intelligence or talent, but the ones with with the highest levels of mental toughness. Mental toughness, it turns out, is a skill that can be built by a series of small but regular wins.

So let’s say you want to become a more ethical leader. You start by defining what that means to you. It might be leading a training session on conflict of interests instead of letting HR do it. It might be sharing an ethical decision that you made in the company’s monthly newsletter. It might be recognizing an employee who made a good call as part of your weekly all-hands meeting. Whatever it is, the key is to find something easy, something that doesn’t require motivation, and to do it consistently. As you accumulate these small wins, you will assume the identity of an ethical leader. Once you truly think of yourself as an ethical leader, you will be emboldened and move from small wins to big ones.

What small win can you commit to for next week, and every week thereafter?

We’ve all been in the office of a professional and felt intimidated and rushed. Whether it was a doctor or a lawyer or an accountant, we felt mildly stupid and taking too much of their time. Often it wasn’t something they said; it was simply all the diplomas on the walls and the big words they used and the speed of their speech.

Let’s make sure that we don’t make employees feel the same way when they seek our help as ethics & compliance professionals. For example, they should not feel bad about the fact that we can spot from a mile away a conflict of interest that is invisible to them, or that they didn’t know how to make a “noisy exit” during the inappropriate sales discussion at the trade show.

I once had a mentor who always took time to listen to me. Whenever I was facing a difficult situation and needed advice, he’d say “Let’s go for a walk”. Such comforting words! I knew I would get all the time needed, all the attention necessary.

Perhaps we can’t go on a walk with every employee seeking help. But we can make them feel seen and heard. Sometimes, that’s all they want.

Most conflict of interests policies seek to avoid two things: (1) actual conflicts and (2) situations that give even the appearance of a conflict.

The Title of Nobility Clause of the US Constitution (often referred to as the Emoluments Clause) is not as specific. Essentially, it simply states that a person holding office, like the President, should not accept anything of value from a foreign official without permission from Congress.

There is nothing in this clause addressing the appearance of impropriety. Nevertheless, early Presidents understood the importance of appearances and frequently gave away to the Department of State gifts that they received from foreign officials, rather than ask permission to keep the gifts for themselves.

Today, the current President is considering hosting the G7 meeting (a multi-million dollar affair) at a property he owns. Several people are trying to determine if this would constitute a breach of the Emoluments Clause. They are focusing on the letter of the law rather than on its spirit. Meanwhile, a 12-year old could tell you that it doesn’t look right.

Why not simply hold the G7 elsewhere?

As I read Michael Volklov’s excellent summary of the college admission scandal, I wondered if any employee had ever bribed their way into my company.

Seems crazy? Ask yourself these questions: Has anyone ever lied on their resume to get a job with you (padding their educational or professional experience)? Has anyone ever improperly used a relationship they have with an existing employee to get through the door (a classic conflict of interest)? If your organization is large enough, the answer is probably yes.

So while it’s unlikely that any of your current managers would accept a bribe in exchange for a job, it’s not impossible. And it’s worthy of a fun 5-minute exercise during your next management meeting.